We play ping pong at work (during lunch and at the end of the day, of course). Here's the kicker: I am by far and away the worst player in the office. Sure, we have two new employees that have started playing and I can beat them. But they're rapidly progressing faster than I am, and in no time I'll be back to being that guy that can't win against anyone.
It's funny; after all those years in school learning new programs and materials and taking tests, I kinda had this underlying belief that I'd float to the top of whatever it is I set my mind to. And here I am, being one to the people that practices (or plays, rather) the most and can't seem to get anywhere near the winner's circle. I find myself thinking, "Wait, really? What's wrong with me?", as if usually all I do is will success to happen.
But it doesn't. Not with a ping pong paddle in hand, and not after 2000 serves in 100 games. It just won't come.
And then I think back to those glorious highschool days, where I was consistently one of the last 3-4 kids chosen for any given activity in the dreaded gym class. Right. That's where I belong when it comes to such things. I have a long and consciously forgotten history of poor co-ordination and performance, and I guess some things always stay the same.
That doesn't mean I can't enjoy myself, though. Thankfully, almost everyone at work are gracious winners and I have fun playing and losing as long as I get the odd point in or make a lucky save.
I know it's a dumb thing to say, but I you can't expect to do well at everything. I'm glad I have the natural inclinations I do (technology, learning... other stuff too, I hope). But I'm even gladder that I can enjoy sucking at something, too.
-Cril
Tuesday, June 23, 2015
Sunday, June 21, 2015
Two sides of the gun
Steam Summer Sale! This has probably been the first time in a long time that I've really been able to participate, and I probably put more time into the Monster Clicker game than I should've. Goofy and utterly pointless, but I somehow found myself checking in 3-4 times over the course of a day to see how I was doing. Taking a step back as someone who works in advertising, it's certainly a clever way to get people engaged with the sale. I wonder if gamers in particular are more likely to participate in futile activities with glaringly obvious commercial overtones. Strange.
I bought 'This War of Mine' on sale after a LOT of deliberation (including reading reviews, deciding I would get it, watching playthroughs, deciding I wouldn't get it, more trailers/reviews/videos). I figured that, as someone who feels some sort of connection to to warfare beyond the typical guns and explosions, it would give me a better perspective on things. And boy, it did. It also played directly into my bizarre attraction to the tragic and depressing.
It's an incredible experience, really. I guess it falls into that 'survival' genre that's so hot right now, but it feels like anything but a popular cash grab. It has a lot of soul to it, and definitely gave me a new perspective on things. The gameplay itself is simple (scavenging, crafting, constantly maintaining well-being) but is utterly unforgiving. The combat is quick and lethal, and there are no save states. If one of your people dies to a freak accident (such as one of my characters that got locked inside a hostile building and was gunned down while trying to find an exit), that's it. Not only do you need to cope with the loss of a critically skilled team member, but the rest of the cast will become depressed at the lost. Let that depression linger too long and they'll kill themselves. Yeah. And the same goes for stealing from a hospital or elderly couple (even though you desperately needed the meds and food to make it through one more day). Your actions have consequences, and it's all tied together and delicately balanced on the head of a pin. I don't think I've had such tension (and emotional connection) from a video game in a very long time. Definitely qualifies for the 'game as art' category.
Side note: On my second playthrough, I made an easy custom scenario where there was an abundance of supplies, short/mild winter, and a lack of hostile presence. The game immediately lost 90% of what makes it incredible. Without the tight strain of rationing, you don't have to make the hard choices and live with them afterwards. The bleak struggle is what fuels the experience's beautiful, heart-wrenching impact that elevates it high above what other titles can hope to achieve.
5/5.
And now, by way of contrast, Borderlands 2. Spoilers ahead:
Do you like shooting? Do you like finding better guns to shoot with?
That's the entirety of the game. Go to X location, use guns to shoot the bad guys, unlock new weapons, go to z location, use new guns to shoot the bad guys. Get a skill point to let you shoot better. Repeat the process. Get to the end of the story? Do it all again! More bad guys! More shooting! More guns!
Needless to say, it got stale pretty fast. And although the writing didn't quite tickle my funny bone, I applaud Gearbox for making an FPS with a sense of humour. The art/visual style is pretty solid too. The shooting feels pretty tight. The main thing I liked was how utterly simple and seamless it was to have other players join your game and play together. No lobbies or hassle, and it's nice to 'drop-in' on someone that'd otherwise being playing a single player campaign.
Aside from that... It is what it is. Well made and unique, but ultimately repetitive as hell.
3/5.
In other news, I also bought the Stanley Parable and GTAV, neither of which I've cracked yet (my meager bandwidth allowance means I'll need to setup my laptop at the office over the weekend to download the latter). I was on the fence for a long time over GTA. It looks good and was well reviewed and I definitely want to play it, of course. But $70? Ouch. Alas, that's the new reality for us Canucks. If it was any other game I'd gladly wait for the price to drop after a year or so, but in this case peer pressure from a couple of sides pushed me over the edge.
I mean, hey, I'm a dude getting paid a career salary while livin' on the cheap. I guess I'm entitled to the occasional fit of consumerism.
-Cril
No music? No music.
I bought 'This War of Mine' on sale after a LOT of deliberation (including reading reviews, deciding I would get it, watching playthroughs, deciding I wouldn't get it, more trailers/reviews/videos). I figured that, as someone who feels some sort of connection to to warfare beyond the typical guns and explosions, it would give me a better perspective on things. And boy, it did. It also played directly into my bizarre attraction to the tragic and depressing.
It's an incredible experience, really. I guess it falls into that 'survival' genre that's so hot right now, but it feels like anything but a popular cash grab. It has a lot of soul to it, and definitely gave me a new perspective on things. The gameplay itself is simple (scavenging, crafting, constantly maintaining well-being) but is utterly unforgiving. The combat is quick and lethal, and there are no save states. If one of your people dies to a freak accident (such as one of my characters that got locked inside a hostile building and was gunned down while trying to find an exit), that's it. Not only do you need to cope with the loss of a critically skilled team member, but the rest of the cast will become depressed at the lost. Let that depression linger too long and they'll kill themselves. Yeah. And the same goes for stealing from a hospital or elderly couple (even though you desperately needed the meds and food to make it through one more day). Your actions have consequences, and it's all tied together and delicately balanced on the head of a pin. I don't think I've had such tension (and emotional connection) from a video game in a very long time. Definitely qualifies for the 'game as art' category.
Side note: On my second playthrough, I made an easy custom scenario where there was an abundance of supplies, short/mild winter, and a lack of hostile presence. The game immediately lost 90% of what makes it incredible. Without the tight strain of rationing, you don't have to make the hard choices and live with them afterwards. The bleak struggle is what fuels the experience's beautiful, heart-wrenching impact that elevates it high above what other titles can hope to achieve.
5/5.
And now, by way of contrast, Borderlands 2. Spoilers ahead:
Do you like shooting? Do you like finding better guns to shoot with?
That's the entirety of the game. Go to X location, use guns to shoot the bad guys, unlock new weapons, go to z location, use new guns to shoot the bad guys. Get a skill point to let you shoot better. Repeat the process. Get to the end of the story? Do it all again! More bad guys! More shooting! More guns!
Needless to say, it got stale pretty fast. And although the writing didn't quite tickle my funny bone, I applaud Gearbox for making an FPS with a sense of humour. The art/visual style is pretty solid too. The shooting feels pretty tight. The main thing I liked was how utterly simple and seamless it was to have other players join your game and play together. No lobbies or hassle, and it's nice to 'drop-in' on someone that'd otherwise being playing a single player campaign.
Aside from that... It is what it is. Well made and unique, but ultimately repetitive as hell.
3/5.
In other news, I also bought the Stanley Parable and GTAV, neither of which I've cracked yet (my meager bandwidth allowance means I'll need to setup my laptop at the office over the weekend to download the latter). I was on the fence for a long time over GTA. It looks good and was well reviewed and I definitely want to play it, of course. But $70? Ouch. Alas, that's the new reality for us Canucks. If it was any other game I'd gladly wait for the price to drop after a year or so, but in this case peer pressure from a couple of sides pushed me over the edge.
I mean, hey, I'm a dude getting paid a career salary while livin' on the cheap. I guess I'm entitled to the occasional fit of consumerism.
-Cril
No music? No music.
Tuesday, June 16, 2015
Fury Road
Inception: A thief who steals corporate secrets through use of dream-sharing technology is given the inverse task of planting an idea into the mind of a CEO.
Edge of Tomorrow: A military officer is brought into an alien war against an extraterrestrial enemy who can reset the day and know the future.
Mad Max: Fury Road: Some bad guys chase the good guys through the desert.
Fury Road is a spectacle. It is not cerebral or intellectual by any means, and unlike Inception or Edge of Tomorrow, it does not have a fantastical concept that will challenge your view of the world and amaze you with amazing possibilities. Instead, it will show you explosions and cars tossed into a blender full of dust. It is the purest essence of the Action Flick genre.
But here's the thing: It perfected it. The premise is so simple and sounds so bland, but it was executed to a level where it becomes so much more than a mere spectacle. Yes, the action was impressive and easy to follow. The art direction was fantastic and the visuals stunning. But it was also delightfully weird.
There are many incredible little details scattered throughout, that are so off-kilter and utterly strange. Yes, we all know what a post-apocalyptic setting is like, but I don't think I've seen it be so alien before. Kamikaze warriors that spray their mouths with chrome before their sacrifice. A shoe/foot sizer for gas pedals. An accountant with a suit, metal nose covering, and exposed nipples. A collection of women being farmed for milk. And, of course, a guitar flamethrower hooked up to a massive set of speakers.
What's best is that the creators knew how to withold information, teasing you with just enough strangeness to make you wonder what led this world to be the way it is. They didn't tell us what exactly was going on with those hunched-over people on stilts in the marsh. They were just there. For a mere moment. Totally unexpected and not telling their story, but openly inviting you to imagine it for yourself.
Wonderful. I honestly think that too many movies these days try too hard to wrap everything up in a neat bow for the viewer, which kills some of the magic. Boba Fett does not need a back story. He's a badass that just shows up and silently does his thing. Not knowing his name or where he's from or why he's there adds to the allure. The less you know about a character (or setting) can make their presence that much more powerful. We don't know how Empirator Furiosa lost her arm, we don't need to know, and that lack of knowledge makes her character that much more intruiging.
A couple other thoughts:
Edge of Tomorrow: A military officer is brought into an alien war against an extraterrestrial enemy who can reset the day and know the future.
Mad Max: Fury Road: Some bad guys chase the good guys through the desert.
Fury Road is a spectacle. It is not cerebral or intellectual by any means, and unlike Inception or Edge of Tomorrow, it does not have a fantastical concept that will challenge your view of the world and amaze you with amazing possibilities. Instead, it will show you explosions and cars tossed into a blender full of dust. It is the purest essence of the Action Flick genre.
But here's the thing: It perfected it. The premise is so simple and sounds so bland, but it was executed to a level where it becomes so much more than a mere spectacle. Yes, the action was impressive and easy to follow. The art direction was fantastic and the visuals stunning. But it was also delightfully weird.
There are many incredible little details scattered throughout, that are so off-kilter and utterly strange. Yes, we all know what a post-apocalyptic setting is like, but I don't think I've seen it be so alien before. Kamikaze warriors that spray their mouths with chrome before their sacrifice. A shoe/foot sizer for gas pedals. An accountant with a suit, metal nose covering, and exposed nipples. A collection of women being farmed for milk. And, of course, a guitar flamethrower hooked up to a massive set of speakers.
What's best is that the creators knew how to withold information, teasing you with just enough strangeness to make you wonder what led this world to be the way it is. They didn't tell us what exactly was going on with those hunched-over people on stilts in the marsh. They were just there. For a mere moment. Totally unexpected and not telling their story, but openly inviting you to imagine it for yourself.
Wonderful. I honestly think that too many movies these days try too hard to wrap everything up in a neat bow for the viewer, which kills some of the magic. Boba Fett does not need a back story. He's a badass that just shows up and silently does his thing. Not knowing his name or where he's from or why he's there adds to the allure. The less you know about a character (or setting) can make their presence that much more powerful. We don't know how Empirator Furiosa lost her arm, we don't need to know, and that lack of knowledge makes her character that much more intruiging.
A couple other thoughts:
- I love that at one point the title character goes off to commit badassery and we aren't invited to come along. He just goes and comes back. That, to me, somehow shows the confidence of the film makers and cements just how awesome this guy is. Showing the action would've just dulled things and made it less interesting.
- Traumatic flashes spliced in over chaotic action. Intense, vivid colour palettes. Slightly sped-up film. The whole thing together turns into this wonderfully surreal nightmare.
- The 'cars' (if you can call them that) were amazing.
- I don't think I've been so riveted in my seat and exhausted by the end since I saw Inception in theatres. The whole movie just kept on going, building towards and explosive finish.
- I think Tom Hardy 'evolved' Max in a pretty solid direction. In the previous films, he seemed like a bit of a loner desperado with a steel gaze. With the latest iteration, I get the feeling that Max is lonely and troubled, and his human thoughts and feelings are all he has to keep himself company. True, there wasn't really any character development over the course of Fury Road, but I get the feeling that a vivid portrait of Max was painted over the duration.
- Face masks, a prosthetic arm, a leg brace... It was fantastic how humans and machines were intertwined, especially among the three main characters. Some great mirroring going on there.
- Dat colour palette. Yellow, orange, red. Then absolutely blue. Then yellow, orange, red. Green made an appearance three times - at the beginning, middle, and end.
- Great framing and great cinematography. Sometimes it was striking, and sometimes it just added to that sense of a unrelenting nightmare.
There's more. I'm sure there's more - I get the feeling that so much love was put into the small details in this film that I might need another screening or two in order to fully appreciate it. It's dense. Dense with action, characters, intrigue, chaos, art direction, and strange little cues. For a 'bad guys chase the good guys' movie, you can't ask for much more.
-Cril
When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide
And I stop and I turn and I go for a ride
And I get to the bottom and I see you again
Well do you, don't you want me to make you?
I'm coming down fast but don't let me break you
Tell me, tell me, tell me your answer
You may be a lover but you ain't no dancer
Look out!
Helter skelter
Helter skelter
Helter skelter
Beatles - Helter Skelter
Tuesday, June 09, 2015
Live a Little, Get Around
The opportunity came up at work to art direct an edgy, energetic, and intentionally vague promo piece, contracting the actual work out to a separate studio. Talking about it, me and my buddy got really inspired and excited, and volunteered to do the whole thing over the weekend and off the clock.
So that's what we did. And we had a fantastic time doing so, putting in about 20 hours each over the weekend. By the end of it we were exhausted, but ultimately stoked for what we had come up with.
I remember spending all my weekends in the studio at school and thinking, "Once I graduate I'm never going to do this to myself ever again. I'm tired and miserable and just want to go sleep/watch a movie/play vidya games/etc." On my way home Sunday night, though, I found myself appreciating how much fun I had creating with my friend. A notion crept up on me like a thief that, rather than removing possessions, leaves behind realizations. I just spent the weekend doing what I loved.
Over and over I've told myself that a select few people in the world ever get to work at what they love. Lo and behold, for one weekend at least, that was me. What a wild idea: I do love what I do, and I get to be paid for it. Granted, this feeling comes and goes given the project, but still. Even if it's just the odd something, I'm pretty lucky. That's a cool thing to have as part of your life once in a while.
Then, lo and behold, after showing the project to the boss and making some revisions... The client's getting cold feet on the direction they had agreed on and the project may be trimmed down substantially to make it more widely digestible. I feel like we're putting a cool project into an induced coma.
But that's the business, and that's life. I'm freakin' exhausted from missing out on a weekend and several evenings (fun fact: at some point last night I was in a hallucinatory state where my blankets were the layers of my project, and I spent a considerable amount of time rotating and changing the order they were in). But I'm still a bit buzzed at how much I enjoyed myself over those two intense days. I'm even jazzed at the mere idea that I can have such a good time at my profession.
-Cril
Live a little be a gypsy, get around
Get your feet up off the ground
Live a little, get around
Live a little be a gypsy, get around
Get your feet up off the ground
Live a little, get around
Hand across the water
Heads across the sky
Hand across the water
Heads across the sky
Paul & Linda McCartney - Uncle Albert / Admiral Halsey
So that's what we did. And we had a fantastic time doing so, putting in about 20 hours each over the weekend. By the end of it we were exhausted, but ultimately stoked for what we had come up with.
I remember spending all my weekends in the studio at school and thinking, "Once I graduate I'm never going to do this to myself ever again. I'm tired and miserable and just want to go sleep/watch a movie/play vidya games/etc." On my way home Sunday night, though, I found myself appreciating how much fun I had creating with my friend. A notion crept up on me like a thief that, rather than removing possessions, leaves behind realizations. I just spent the weekend doing what I loved.
Over and over I've told myself that a select few people in the world ever get to work at what they love. Lo and behold, for one weekend at least, that was me. What a wild idea: I do love what I do, and I get to be paid for it. Granted, this feeling comes and goes given the project, but still. Even if it's just the odd something, I'm pretty lucky. That's a cool thing to have as part of your life once in a while.
Then, lo and behold, after showing the project to the boss and making some revisions... The client's getting cold feet on the direction they had agreed on and the project may be trimmed down substantially to make it more widely digestible. I feel like we're putting a cool project into an induced coma.
But that's the business, and that's life. I'm freakin' exhausted from missing out on a weekend and several evenings (fun fact: at some point last night I was in a hallucinatory state where my blankets were the layers of my project, and I spent a considerable amount of time rotating and changing the order they were in). But I'm still a bit buzzed at how much I enjoyed myself over those two intense days. I'm even jazzed at the mere idea that I can have such a good time at my profession.
-Cril
Live a little be a gypsy, get around
Get your feet up off the ground
Live a little, get around
Live a little be a gypsy, get around
Get your feet up off the ground
Live a little, get around
Hand across the water
Heads across the sky
Hand across the water
Heads across the sky
Paul & Linda McCartney - Uncle Albert / Admiral Halsey
Wednesday, June 03, 2015
Old Familiar Score
While I was in school, I had a bit of a mantra that matched my current state of being. It took the form of a Beatles' lyric (as such things tend to do) that went:
I'm so tired
I haven't slept a wink
I'm so tired
My mind is on the blink
Never mind the rest of the song. Even though I never had to do an all-nighter (which is something I'm kinda proud of, by the way), there were many late nights. And aside from physical rest, my mantra was expressing a general state of mental exhaustion for going, going, going on school and homework and workwork without much respite.
Have you ever had one of those weeks that just drags on forever? Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've had one of those that lasted five years.
The other day, I was getting a ride to work with a friend when I'm So Tired came through his stereo. I had the sudden realization that it's been a looooooong time since those familiar opening lines had crossed my mind. It was like running across an old friend that, quite frankly, you didn't really miss all that much in the first place.
It was a liberating feeling to know that I was past that part in my life. A good reminder of how much better things are than they were.
-Cril
It seems to me I've heard that song before
It's from an old familiar score I know it well, that melody
It's funny how a theme recalls a favorite dream
Dream that brought you so close to me
I know each word because I've heard that song before
The lyrics said, "Forevermore" Forevermore's a memory
Vera Lynn - I've Heard That Song Before
I'm so tired
I haven't slept a wink
I'm so tired
My mind is on the blink
Never mind the rest of the song. Even though I never had to do an all-nighter (which is something I'm kinda proud of, by the way), there were many late nights. And aside from physical rest, my mantra was expressing a general state of mental exhaustion for going, going, going on school and homework and workwork without much respite.
Have you ever had one of those weeks that just drags on forever? Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've had one of those that lasted five years.
The other day, I was getting a ride to work with a friend when I'm So Tired came through his stereo. I had the sudden realization that it's been a looooooong time since those familiar opening lines had crossed my mind. It was like running across an old friend that, quite frankly, you didn't really miss all that much in the first place.
It was a liberating feeling to know that I was past that part in my life. A good reminder of how much better things are than they were.
-Cril
It seems to me I've heard that song before
It's from an old familiar score I know it well, that melody
It's funny how a theme recalls a favorite dream
Dream that brought you so close to me
I know each word because I've heard that song before
The lyrics said, "Forevermore" Forevermore's a memory
Vera Lynn - I've Heard That Song Before
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