Wind Down/Up

Another obligated blog post. I'm getting so stressed on the run up to school. There's so much I need to get done, and I was (foolishly) hoping that I could spend the last two weeks before school trying to calm the nerves. Part of it is the fault of my relatives (Uncle/Aunt/Cousins) that came into town. I've spent ALL of the last four evenings with them. Which, really, was rather nice. We spent some good time together. I managed to simultaneously wrestle and beat up all my cousins from that side of the family at once. And my uncle treated me to my first straight-razor shave (MANCHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED), and we went out for a good brunch, and had some birthday cake, and watched a neat documentary on re-creating the WWII dam busters attack.

The problem was that I was expecting them in late Sunday before leaving mid Monday, and was kinda banking on Sat/Mon/Tue evening to get stuff done. Blog, email, a few freelance projects, renew insurance, etc etc. But these evenings evaporated in a rather unproductive, yet still pleasant manner. Bah. I don't feel bad for spending time with them, it's just a tad frusterating how the precious few drops of summer seem to be seeping through the cracks.

Anyways, there's lots to do with lots of responsibilities. Which is kinda good that I finally got a dataphone with a plan. I can be in touch and connected where ever I go. I've texted more in the past week than I have in the past three years. Most favorably, I think I like having the ability to get directions from wherever I'm at to whever it is I need to go. Quite handy. It eats the battery like crazy, but it's a fair trade off. And I have a USB adapter/cable in my car for recharging the contraption anyways.

I'm not quite sold on the smartphone, though. Particularly, I'm not sure about being connected all the time and being expected to be reachable 24/7. It's kinda nice to spend time in communication limbo, you know? Whatever.

To completely switch tracks, isn't it interesting when an expected opinion is finally blurted out? It's one of those things where you have absolutely no proof of it, but you completely know what people think/talk about you when you aren't around. And in a moment of fatigue, it comes out when you're around. And really, it isn't even viscous or hurtful or meant in any kind of malicious way. Just a bit of a playful jab. Something you'd been expecting for a loooooong time, and can't fault any party for letting it slip. And it comes, and it's not a big deal, and you part ways, and it still isn't a big deal. And you're driving somewhere and pondering how it really isn't any big deal. And you realize you can't quite shake thinking/analyzing this thing that definitely isn't a big deal at all. But the sheer fact that it simply won't go away is proof enough that there's something there that still needs to be digested, and even then it'll still almost certainly come back up again shortly. One of those cases where your rational and emotional selves are at odds with each other. Kind of intriguing from a spectator's point of view. You know that there's just enough of something there to cast some reasonable doubt and mental discomfort. This isn't a social problem... It's an introspective one.
-Cril

Daft Punk - Derezzed